Sunday, May 07, 2006

Phone Sex

I listen to Hamish & Andy on the radio in my car on the way home everyday. These 2 fellows are a couple of funny bones and they like to play pranks on just about anybody. Last week they decided to play a prank on a couple of phone sex workers. What they did was ring up one, put her on hold, ring another one and then get the 2 phone sex workers to talk to each other not realising that they were actually talking to each other!

You can download their podcast here or you can just listen to the prank here. I've written down the diaogue of the conversation below.


Girl 1: Hello
Girl 2: Hi! How are you?
Girl 1: Good...how are you?
Girl 2: I'm very good.
Girl 1: What are you doing?
Girl 2: Me? Just lying back, relaxing. What are you doing?
Girl 1: Lying back relaxing...where are you?
Girl 2: Just on my bed, what are you doing to yourself right now?
Girl 1: Oh...nothing, how old are you?
Girl 2: Me? 40 and yourself?
Girl 1: 28 honey...ya...
Girl 2: Yeah? Oo..I like a younger woman...
Girl 1: Do you?
Girl 2: Uh..huh..
Girl 1: What are you wearing?
Girl 2: Me? Just a little singlet & pant, what about yourself?
Girl 1: Mm...I'm wearing a black mini-skirt, G-string, a black bra & a red top.
Girl 2: Oo..sounds nice..
Girl 1: Umm..thanks.
Girl 2: What'd you be doing if I were there right now?

*PAUSE* At this time there was a pause, I think Girl #1 was thinking something's not quite right but she continues...

Girl 1: Anything you want..
Girl 2: Yeah? What would you want me to be doing to you?
Girl 1: Anything honey, yeah?
Girl 2: Yeah...
Girl 1: Weren't you at work baby?
Girl 2: Pardon?
Girl 1: Didn't you say you're at work?
Girl 2: Am I at work?
Girl 1: Yeah.
Girl 2: No, I'm just home.
Girl 1: You told me the whole time you're at work baby?

*PAUSE* Another pause coz Girl #1 is even more suspicious now & Girl #2 is feeling it too!

Girl 2: Pardon?
Girl 1: Just told me the whole time you're at work baby?

*PAUSE* 3rd pause coz they're both feeling uneasy now.

Girl 2: No, I'm at home.
Girl 1: Did you ring me or I ring you?
Girl 2: You ring me.
Girl 1: No, you ring me honey.

*PAUSE* It suddenly hit!

Girl 2: You sure about that?
Girl 1: I'm positive OK?
Girl 2: Yeah? OK, where are you? At home?
Girl 1: Yeah, have a good day. Bye.

They were both reading from the same scripts!

33 comments:

surrealist said...

Listened to the podcast. I started laughing as soon as the first girl said "hello".
Thanks for that.
Hey wuching, I seemed to have hit a nerve on someone eh? I'm talented like that...hahahaha. I shall refrain from commenting or you'll get verbal diarrhoea-ed AGAIN!

suituapui said...

I think Surrealist shouldn't take it personally. EVERYONE is entitled to his own opinions (justified or otherwise) and he made an apt observation for which QV had a perfectly good explanation!!! No need to get ugly lah!!! Hey, wuching aka kopi aman, step aside! I'm takingover!

suituapui said...

BTW, wuching...sure that wasn't a conversation when u called some sweet young thing and ended up speaking to your....wife???

Wuching said...

surrealist: use ur power for good, not evil

STP: no, that was u speaking to QV! hahahaha

suituapui said...

Ha ha ha ha! U also CBC now kah???

Wuching said...

STP: i'm never CBC wan...hit me wif all u got, still no CBC!

QuaVadis said...

Wahlau, with KNB hu lampah in Bintulu supporting his big boss during nomination day...STP wants to take over Kopi Aman's place..hahahaha...

Err Surrealist? U hit a nerve? No lah..if you read all my comments i wuching..its all very long winded one....clarifying only what you asked for....was thinking of ignoring you at first..but then had pity on you or else you have nothing vent your pent up frustration at...so shoot at me as much as you want...it matters not to me for I don't know you and thus I forgive you for all those things that you think of about me.

QuaVadis said...

Monday morning..still suffering from Monday blues....type wrongly everything..what I wanted to say is..

Surrealist? U hit a nerve? No lah..if you read all my comments in Wuching, its all very long winded one....clarifying only what you questioned me about..was thinking of ignoring you at first, but then, had pity on you or else you have no one to vent up your pent up frustration at...so shoot at me as much as you want..it matters not to me for I don't know you and thus I forgive you for all those things that you think of about me.

suituapui said...

Haiya, QV...he just made a remark lah! Why so sensitive one? Urs is a SERIOUS blog so that's why it's like that! Then u go other gila-gila people's blog (Oops!), then u also fool around like everybody else. When in Rome, do as the Romans do, ya? Don't tell me u also another CBC...! Gosh! 1 is MORE than enuf!

QuaVadis said...

Err STP? U talk what ah? I'm a bit confused.....I know, Surrealist made a remark about how I write in my blog a few posting below and I clarified what I am doing loh...and then in this posting, he/she states that he/she hits a nerve...so I come up with a reply loh...she didn't hit a nerve what...that's how I reply to people what...isn't that true Wuching.. :P

If you read Surrealist comment a few posting ago...it seems that what he/she says about me a few weeks ago..could also apply to him/her...that's why I invited him/her to write to me, rather than just simply simply say things about people and then say he/she hit a nerve, cos he/she knows nothing about me and is getting the wrong idea lah.....and end up making himself/herself look so stupid only...so I take pity loh and forgive her for that nasty comment she made so long ago and now invite her to get to know me better loh so she can truly tembak me kau kau next time with correct facts rather than just simply say say....besides we have so many frustrated people in the world, so try to release lah some of the frustration on me Surrealist, rather than letting it become an cancer in your body and end up eating you. It seems Surrealist that you have some gripe with me, so feel free to write to me about it rather than doing what you are doing now. God Bless you and may you have a nice day.

suituapui said...

Zzzzzzzz......!!! BTW, who's this surreal fella??

QuaVadis said...

Dnt know, must be someone that seems to be craving to be poked fun at like how we poke fun and shoot each other down in wuching's blog so that he/she can feel accepted..for if he/she has read our comments from so long ago, we only poke fun at people we love and care for only..:P

Or it could be a case of someone very frustrated with his/her life and how it has turned out for him/her and thus is extremely bitter and just wish to be a meddlesome busybody and butt in and comment and give his/her two cents worth on things that's not related to him/her.

Wuching said...

QV: i'm sure surrealist didn't mean any harm...

STP: ur the sherlock holmes, go find out who surrealist is!

robin said...

LOL.. that was a funny shit.. ahahhahahaa they were so clueless... interesting one !!!

QuaVadis said...

Wuching..Yeah....I know..either one of the two above reasons..and I greatly hope its the first one..for it its the second one..so sad lah

suituapui said...

Eek! U mean people comment on ur blog and u dont know who they are...??? U think I chiak pa bo su cho??? Sherlock Holmes indeed!

Laksa said...

very funny indeed :)

Neo said...

Hahaha... good one. Don't try that at home :)

QuaVadis said...

Hey Laksa!!

Welcome back...if you read your comments I left for you in your blog just now..I tot u got stuck in phuket :P

Wuching said...

robin: good fun?

QV: i'm sure its just good fun

STP: i'm open to everyone

laksa: haha

neo: do try it!

QuaVadis said...

Wuching...you are asking for trouble in replying to STP by saying you are open to everyone....hehehe..sounds like a cheap prostitute hehahahaha

Wuching said...

QV: siao ah! dont call me a cheap prostitute! its expensive prostitute tou!

Anonymous said...

I should re-write what I first wrote at the top. Instead of "i shall refrain from commenting....." (which is perhaps too general and self limiting), it should now read "i shall refrain from commenting about quavadis and/or his comments".
Little comments seemed to have triggered another round of verbal diarrhoea. Such is the power of words.
Mr Wuching..power lies in the words,...as for me...very powerless one!Listened to some of the other hamish&andy podcasts as well...they're quite entertaining unlike some of the radio deejays who infuriate listeners at times. You just end up changing stations from point a to point b.

surrealist said...

Oops forgot to leave an ID on above posting. But it's an easy guess and it ain't important.

QuaVadis said...

Surrealist Bravo Bravo..clap clap...most well said comment I've seen from you so far..keep it up and stick to what you have written. Thank you.

Surrealist said...

Disclaimer: The following is not a comment per se, but a message.

Quavadis, it wasn't intended for your "benefit". But if you're elated, good for you.

yvy said...

*poke QV...poke STP...poke Wuching*

since u never poke me, i assume u dont lub me lor, so now i poke u first - u all better lub me now, ok???? lol :P

*runs for cover*

Wuching said...

yvy: we all love u! sked if we poke u too hard, u cry!

Cocka Doodle said...

Pssst!!! Ermmm...errrmm....can you pass me the phone numbers of that place ah?

yvy said...

cheh....wuching, i big girl edi lor. lol :P can handle wan, if kenot then i whack u all with my spikey sampan paddle lor...:D

Neo said...

What number to call?

Wuching said...

cocka: sure! gimme ur email address..

yvy: ok, get ready to be poked kau kau!

neo: 1900-DIY-WANK

QuaVadis said...

YvY..apa poke poke... don't simply poke poke or else I report u to the police for sexual harrasment..hahahahahaha

We love everybody but we don't simply poke poke or else we end up being reported for harrasment mah hahahahahahahahaha so we only poke people we know personally...ahaha